Maven’s, Moxie and Marathon’s

The East Coast has had a difficult week---an unprecedented storm with destruction that cannot yet be completely quantified wounded us. In the midst of loss of life, property, and businesses, we have also seen great acts of generosity, care, and civility from our neighbors. New York is tough--we’ve got moxie--and our resolve to rebuild from ashes will be clear in the days and weeks ahead.

This week also knew something quiet and personally sad to me in the passing of Leticia Baldrige---the once Social Secretary to the Kennedy White House, and woman known in the world of Etiquette as one of the true maven’s of good taste. I had the wonderful fortune to speak with Ms. Baldrige via conference call a few years ago during my Etiquette training at the Global Protocol Academy in Chicago. Her grace, her knowledge, and her willingness to allow us to bend her ear were such a joy, and an experience I will remember with great fondness for years to come.

I thought of her rather intently the past few days when it was made known that the City of New York would still be holding the annual Marathon----a huge undertaking that would literally have runners galloping in delight a few short miles away from people who are struggling to regain some sense of balance in their lives---some with no homes, no resources, whose singular focus is the procurement of food, water, heat and shelter. Oh yes, there were the arguments---“people travel from all over the world to run this race”—it builds the economy”. But that picture lacked civility, compassion and common sense---unless of course, you were going to send those runners into the damaged neighborhoods carrying meals for hungry people.

Yes, runners trained for months to run---and they should be congratulated for that. But at this moment I reserve my congratulations for those that finally made the right decision. Bravo to abandoning corporate and the self-centered interests of a few for something higher---civility and compassion. I think Ms. Baldrige would have said something quite nice about that---

Give This Summer the Slip----Please…..

As the summer begins, I am preparing myself for the annual onslaught of eye wounding poor taste. I am readying myself for another season of over-exposure from those who do not give thanks for Spanx; of those that do not believe that less may actually mean less; and the mathematically challenged that do not understand that 20 pounds of bosom do not fit in 15 pounds of blouse.

I do not in any way mean that one should not wear what one wants to in the heat of the summer, and I embrace the natural beauty that God created in each and every one us. However---over exposure simply isn’t elegant. So please, look in the full-length mirror before you leave home, and if you can see the color of the butterflies wings on your underwear through the garment, you are in fact a candidate for the cover of Bad Taste Magazine, so please put something else on---those of us who ride public transportation with you will be so very thankful--- trust me.

Yes, I am a relic, and I still wear slips under see-through garments---I know I am a dying breed and I intend to leave my collection of lovely lace slips to the Smithsonian. But in the meantime, let us pray the following prayer for this summer and the summers to come…

Oh Gracious Deity of all things fashionable,
We pray for the reemergence of the slip
She was lacey and lovely
--Soft and silky
She kept our confidences---that demure, lovely slip
She helped us be beautiful---she dictated a standard
She was sometimes misunderstood---sometimes exposed to the world on the outside of clothes
Called old fashioned---too constricting
But I love her---still
I love her in all her incarnations---the camisole—the half-slip—
Oh God of all things fashionable,
Please let us not have to endure one more summer of over- exposed thongs
---of skirts so thin that they leave nothing to the imagination
--of beautiful dresses that end up looking like rags without a slip
---forgive those who have trespassed against elegance
--and lead them not to further temptation
--but deliver them to feminine expression and true beauty
---Amen